the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize