shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
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