Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
