I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
