Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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