I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I hate all girls vehemently.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
So gin and wine won't be happening again
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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