she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize