All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
is that a dick in a sweater?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
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