votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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