my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
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