it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize
