We named our party play list daddy issues
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize
