i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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