You can't motorboat a personality
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
Randomize
