he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
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