I love black thongs
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
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