$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
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