"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
