STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
