we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Operation Purity has been aborted
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
