im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
Randomize
