I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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