Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Randomize
