don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
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