haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
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