Rock
Scissors
Fuck
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
