Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
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