So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
it was like eating out sand paper
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
