My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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