her vagine was all disorganized.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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