You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Randomize
