ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
