We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Even my vagina gasped.
I wish we could skip the pretense of being normal and just start drinking wine with breakfast
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
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