history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
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So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize