i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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