It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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