i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
