is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Randomize
