i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Randomize