HIV tests are more positive than that guy
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
Randomize