We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
