so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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