i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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