areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
Randomize
