do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize