3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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