the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
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