I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
