This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize