Dual....:-)
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I have already put on my inside pants.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
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